Most people assume that anxiety is a choice and something you can control. Most people that think that don't struggle with anxiety, I use to think this until............. my life progressed. A lot of anxiety comes from situations that happen to us that we did not plan and we literally and mentally "tense up" to deal with it and get through it. Once we get through it our minds and bodies tend to be more sensitive to threats and the same situation happening again that brought stress to our bodies and minds in the first place. Medical situations are one of these life situations. Without warning you can find yourself in the same situation and gasping for air and feeling sick to your stomach because you are bracing, bracing for what is to come. When you have health issues and for those of us with chronic health issues this is not a fantasy, it is real and things do in fact KEEP happening. In years past I would see someone outside of a Doctors office crying and being stressed about the appointment and I would think "oh toughen up, give me a break". Now, years later I understand it. I very rarely make a phone call related to health issues or go to one of my hundreds of Doctors appointments that everything goes well and as planned, ever. Something somewhere always goes wrong. It never fails that there is a rude nurse, insensitive Doctor, an insurance issue, waiting , pain from procedures, Doctors or nurses not listening to you, having to explain AGAIN what hurts and why because no one ever reads the charts or looks in the computers before your appointment because they are to busy and do not have time. There is nothing worse then being in pain and after talking to your Doctor he looks surprised because he doesn't "really" remember your last appointment and what he was supposed to get back to you about or why you are here for a follow up with him. All these things cause frustration and anticipation even by the strongest of people. Sometimes its as if you have to convince people over and over that their is still an issue and that you need help. The reality is medical offices like quick and easy cases, get them in and get them out. When you have a chronic issue they grow tired of dealing with you, this is just an unfortunate reality. I say all this to express to all who are out there that deal with medical anxiety that I "get it", I understand. However you have to accept it and find ways to deal. If you do not have someone to help you with phone calls and going with you to Doctor's appointments find someone, it is helpful. Doctors are also more apt to take a few more minutes with you when there is someone else there with you, it makes them more accountable. Take lots of notes and Pray and ask for God's peace and trust Him to work things out. Lastly, be persistent and push when you know something is not right and depend on God in that time to strengthen you and give you His words and patience in the situation. Clear and bold communication is key to getting the care you need and deserve. I cannot tell you how many times I have corrected medical staff that were wrong because I was strong enough to ask a question. You find that strength with leaning on God not leaning on your own strength. The saying that God never gives what you cannot handle is not totally accurate. A friend told me this the other day and she was right. God does bring you to things you cannot handle ( on your own ) it is then that he wants you to lean on him so you can do it together with God's help. That is what he ultimately wants. Hang in there, I understand.